My brother is endangering the rest of the family

Discussion in 'The Hangout' started by bluebetta, Jul 8, 2016.

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  1. bluebetta

    bluebetta Active Member
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    My brother has gotten involved with some shady people and I suspect drugs. My father's guns were all stolen recently. I knew who to suspect, one of my brother's friends. The police found the guns and arrested only the owner of the house they were found in, not everyone involved. The guns are still in police custody, as evidence, and I am not sure how to get them back.
    I knew this friend would not know about the cache of weapons unless my brother took his friends there and showed them. The weapons were in a very remote location. My brother knows too much and now he can't be trusted, and I don't know who he has told what information to. He knows too much about where family valuables are, stored supplies, bugout location, etc. I am very upset that I can no longer trust him and feel he is endangering the family. I don't know what to do about it though other than not trust him from here out. Any advice on how to deal with a Judas in the family?
     
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  2. Keith H.

    Keith H. Moderator Staff Member
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    I can only suggest that from here on you do not trust him with any information that could be used against the family. Make sure items of value, monetary or otherwise are securely locked or hidden away. If he finds he is no longer trusted or thought well of, he may come good, but I guess this depends on how far gone he is & what sort of person he is. Not sure what you can do about his knowledge of your bug out site, other than changing it without his knowledge. Move all valuables to a safer place. Change everything that he has knowledge of.
    Keith.
     
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  3. bluebetta

    bluebetta Active Member
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    You are wise Keith. All I can do right now is damage control. I did some research about getting the stolen guns back. It looks like they can be held as evidence until the court case is completely over. I hope that doesn't include all appeals. That could take a while. I am going to have to go do some damage control and will be gone from the forum for a few days. I look forward to watching some more of your awesome instructional videos when I get back.
     
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  4. Keith H.

    Keith H. Moderator Staff Member
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    I appreciate your comment, & good luck with your damage control bluebetta.
    Regards, Keith.
     
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  5. lonewolf

    lonewolf Moderator Staff Member
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    good luck with that bluebetta. in future remember OPSEC.
     
  6. Zyphir

    Zyphir Member
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    When there is a Judas found among us then all plans and storage they know about must be scrapped and redone without them. Cannot let one person be the down fall of others.
     
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  7. Spicysweetie21

    Spicysweetie21 New Member
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    If he is involved in drugs, then he is probably hooked on whatever they are dealing. I would try tell your folks to get him help. I honestly can't give any advice on the other stuff, but I know what it feels like to have a brother steal from the family. I also know what it feels like to see your brothers face when your Mom passes away. I hope everything works out for you and your family peacefully.
     
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  8. Duncan

    Duncan Expert Member
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    What was that about and who or what is a "billa"?
     
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  9. lonewolf

    lonewolf Moderator Staff Member
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    old thread. Billa is someone who is no longer with us.
     
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  10. JimLE

    JimLE Expert Member
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    I agree with keith.move all catches and bug out location..including what ever is in the home of good/great value. and don't tell your brother where their at..and maybe stop allowing him onto the property until "he" proves that he can be trusted.
     
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  11. coffee

    coffee Expert Member
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    I agree with Keith, in his above comment, move and change everything. Then try to get him in an inpatient treatment plan. Offer him all the help you can...PRAY....Do not give-up on him, he is flesh & blood. I too, know from experience, my youngest son was addicted to heroin for years. I had guns stolen from me as well as other valuables and spent lots of money and a lifetime of time and heart. He was in prison more than he was out...it was the only time I could breath. BUT, one day, I took him out of state to a place in Tennessee where a preacher was going to build a retreat (survival). He stayed there, with No transportation, no phone, not knowing how to get to anyplace. He ate what he was given, and worked hard, long days. He finally got it out of his system after 6 months. He loved his life again, what he learned from the people that came to help build the retreat, and learned a lot of new stuff. He is back now, and he is still clean, except for maybe a few drinks. It is 3 years now. A mother never gives up on her children. Believe me, he hates his life way more than you could ever hate what he has done. Please, help him, and help him get the help he needs. No matter what he tells you, he wants to get free from his addiction. I will pray for him, can you tell me his first name or nickname.
     
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  12. Weedygarden

    Weedygarden Well-Known Member
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    I am wondering if there is an update on this thread, bluebetta? How is your brother doing?
     
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  13. GrizzlyetteAdams

    GrizzlyetteAdams Crap Creek Survivor
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    I hope she eventually finds her way back here. Her profile says, "Going on hiatus for a few days to tend to family matters..." But, she last logged on here in November 2016. :(
     
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  14. TexDanm

    TexDanm Shadow Dancer
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    If you click on someone's name it will pop up some info about them. bluebetta hasn't been on the board since November of 2016.

    For those of you that never got to experience the pleasure of dealing with Billa count your blessings. He was a rude and rather disturbed person that took any level of differing thought as a personal attack. He even made me look polite and peaceful!!
     
  15. Weedygarden

    Weedygarden Well-Known Member
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    What? Tell me about yourself, please. :)
     
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  16. Sonofliberty

    Sonofliberty Expert Member
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    You seem reasonably polite to me.
     
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  17. GrizzlyetteAdams

    GrizzlyetteAdams Crap Creek Survivor
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    Although quite outspoken (yes indeed!), Tex has that gift for disagreeing with someone without resorting to putdowns and insults.

    A big hat tip to you, Tex.


    .
     
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  18. TexDanm

    TexDanm Shadow Dancer
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    I am generally a peaceful sort but occasionally have been known to go on the rampage. My problem is that I have little tolerance with people that can't disagree or discuss things without getting rude and personal. I try hard in life to give back what I'm offered. If you are nice I will always try hard to be nice but if you are rude I'm nobody's whipping boy and am a bit like a wolverine when I get angry.

    Fortunately, we have great moderators here and if I get hot and get out of bounds they rein me in. I doubt I will have a problem with anyone here now. You actually have to push me really far to reach my trigger point.

    I like to think that that was mostly a tongue in cheek statement. Billa was a LOT worse than I was on my worst day. He had a problem and anyone that saw things differently from him. They were in his opinion an IDIOT. The Moderators and Administrators here not only got rid of him they cleared out his obnoxious posts. You are safe here the Mods will see to it.
     
    Last edited: May 28, 2019
  19. Weedygarden

    Weedygarden Well-Known Member
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    I noticed conversations that referred to him, but his posts are gone. POOF! I have encountered internet trolls and bullies and that is the best way to deal with them. I have been on forums where people were banned, and then I see them being all full of themselves elsewhere, using the same username.
     
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  20. lalakai

    lalakai Well-Known Member
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    This thread does bring up a good topic......how to deal with someone in the family/team that has turned against them. When this happened to us, we had to move the highly valuable items completely out of the house, lock up anything else of value, never leave wallet/purse out. Yeah it really bites. That person is now in prison but it taught us how much trouble it can cause, not to mention the huge friction among family and extended family. PPO's are only so good, and if they know your work patterns, they can always pick the times you are away. We keep in contact with him, but are already starting to prepare for when he gets out. He wants to re-establish "normal" contact but until we're certain of his intentions, he won't be allowed back. I can't imagine this situation happening post-SHTF and having to expel someone from the group that knows what we have, where it's kept, and our contingency plans.
     
  21. Weedygarden

    Weedygarden Well-Known Member
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    This has to be really tough when one person in a family betrays the rest by stealing and other nefarious actions. Lying and stealing seem to go hand in hand.
     
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  22. GrizzlyetteAdams

    GrizzlyetteAdams Crap Creek Survivor
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    Sad thing is, even when WE know who we can trust, we can't always be sure of who THEY trust because sometimes even the wisest of us can be fooled.

    That is why keeping a tight lid on my resources is important to me. Even those in my most trusted circle do not know the full extent of what or where all of my resources are. I trust them 100%, but someday one of them may be fooled and trust the wrong person...


    .
     
  23. lonewolf

    lonewolf Moderator Staff Member
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    trust no one-that's my motto, then you wont be surprised WHEN they let you down.
     
  24. Morgan101

    Morgan101 Master Survivalist
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    I'm with Lonewolf on this one. The number of people I trust I could count on one hand, and have fingers left over. If a family member compromised the safety of the family whatever trust they had would be gone forever.

    How do you deal with it? Move everything to a new secure location, and don't say a word about it. They would be persona non grata. Given no information. Not included in any family planning.

    Grizz: You are soooo right. You will never know who they spoke to, or what they let slip.
     
  25. Ystranc

    Ystranc Master Survivalist
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    Just to put it in context Billa was on my ignore list, he was just some fool that used to bull***t about being an expert poacher, not prepping before the event but preying on others after the event using night vision etc.
    He was just a troll, probably about 40 going on 15 years old and still living in his mom's basement.
    He once started going on about selling body fluids to buy a rifle....like anyone would want his fluids?

    As far as Opsec, we are all breaching the first rule just by being on this forum. Tell no one that you prep. Even my close family don't really know, they just see bags, boxes and plastic drums.
     
    Last edited: May 29, 2019
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  26. lonewolf

    lonewolf Moderator Staff Member
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    Billa was/is ancient history and was removed because of his obnoxious attitude to other members.
     
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  27. Weedygarden

    Weedygarden Well-Known Member
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    This is me as well, but the person closest to me doesn't get it. This person has no idea of the level of my preparedness. I do have a friend who is also into preparedness and is the preparedness person for her LDS church. She is the one person who has been invited into my preparedness area, because, she lives states away and has more than I do.

    I try to bring stuff in when no one is around, but my guess is that in spite of how careful we are, there are people who have some awareness or idea that we have some level of preparedness that they would like to access in a SHTF situation.
     
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  28. Morgan101

    Morgan101 Master Survivalist
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    I have said before that there is a blessing side to having a wife, in my case, or a significant other, who is a hoarder. If you looked at my basement or my garage you would think OMG!! This place looks like a goat's stomach. God knows what is in here. I have often said Jimmy Hoffa could be buried in my basement, and no one would know.

    The method to the madness? First, hide in plain sight. You will be looking right at a bunch of preps, and would never know. Second, a great deal of what is hoarded can be used for barter. It is a standing joke among family and friends that before they buy anything they will ask if we have it in our basement. More often than not we do, and they are welcome to it. The caveat is take what you want, but you take it, you own it. DO NOT bring it back. They have no idea what they are looking at, and we like to keep it that way.
     
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  29. Weedygarden

    Weedygarden Well-Known Member
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    I was thinking this myself. My garage is a mess, while all the garages around me are neat and tidy. If someone tried to break into my garage, they would turn around and leave. I have worked on clearing out some stuff that really needs to be gone. I have much more to go, but it does keep getting better, for me, but not for the outsiders. They can't see the forest for the trees.
     
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  30. Snyper

    Snyper Expert Member
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    There are still some like that here. ;)
     
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  31. IBME

    IBME "ALASKAN"
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    I have not read this entire thread, but Billa sounds like the famous "GunKid".
     
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  32. TMT Tactical

    TMT Tactical The Great Lizard !
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    During normal times, we have to ban bad family / friends that fail to uphold our trust and cause trouble. Post SHTF, banning will not be a viable option. You do not need or want a disgruntled person out and about will full knowledge of your preps. So my advice, get rid of the liabilities now, while it does not require a shovel and 6 foot hole.
     
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  33. Caribou

    Caribou Expert Member
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    My SIL is a junkie. I wouldn't trust her as far as I can spit. She seems to be doing well in her current program, I still don't trust her. Mom had to change the locks and take her off the bank accounts.

    Too many people know about my preps. The wife wanted this small home so it is impossible to keep everything hidden. There are aspects of our prepping that nobody is aware of. While I'm fairly open with a group on the net that will never be here there are things that are never spoken about. No family and no friends are included in certain information. My wife and I are the only members of the inner circle.
     
  34. Weedygarden

    Weedygarden Well-Known Member
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    Then there is some tolerance for it here? In some forums, people go on and on, slinging mud at each other and insulting each other. In other forums, it takes just a little to get people banned.
     
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  35. TexDanm

    TexDanm Shadow Dancer
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    The unfortunate truth is that you don't get to pick your family. Hopefully, you pick your friends to a better standard. We have nothing to do with any of my wife's family. I wouldn't trust a single one of them much farther than I can throw an elephant. In a SHTF situation, if you really want to survive, you judge your family just like anyone else. THIS is probably one of the hardest things that many will have to deal with and probably the cause of many well-prepared peoples failure to survive.

    In an apocalyptic world, flaws that you can to some extent ignore in normal times become deadly. Lazy, stupid, greedy, argumentative, criminal, uncooperative, bossy... so many things that you accept in family members will tear apart a group trying to survive or just simply get them and maybe you killed.
     
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  36. Snyper

    Snyper Expert Member
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    Read what I said in the context in which it was written:

    Perceptions aren't always reality.
    I didn't say there were actual attacks occurring.
     
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  37. Old Geezer

    Old Geezer Master Survivalist
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    I had an in-law who was crazy. He's now dead.

    Simple gifts

     
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  38. TMT Tactical

    TMT Tactical The Great Lizard !
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    WeedyGarden, difference in opinion is encouraged, as long as it is kept respectful. Name calling will get a person in deep doo-doo. Simple, I wish to disagree and then state your position is very welcome. You know me, I am about as opinionated any anybody, and so far no problem. Go for it.
     
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  39. The Innkeeper

    The Innkeeper Expert Member
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    Sorry to break it to you but both genders have responsibility in bringing the world to crap. Sorry about whatever happened to you. Abuse runs both ways, I have seen it first hand
     
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